It’s been a pretty rough week. Last Wednesday I went to the doctor for what I thought was adrenal fatigue. She walked in the room, asked how I was, and I started sobbing. Hmmmm. She said what she thinks is going on is really stress-induced depression. She agreed to run some bloodwork and I agreed to start an anti-depressant. I wish I could say it was a wonder drug that made me feel as happy as prednizone does. I spent 4 days with a churning stomach and a week of not sleeping well and not wanting to get off of the couch. Last night at 5pm I got a burst of energy that had me going until 10:30. I slept well for the 2nd night in a row.
Emotionally I feel pretty neutral. Not too high, not low, just steady. I’m a pretty emotional person, usually upbeat. This nothingness is really strange.
Back at the beginning of the year when I felt like I was starting on a new adventure and taking that 1st step on the journey of a thousand miles, depression was NOT the journey I thought I was facing! I have a piece of paper beside my bed that I wrote at the beginning of 2013 that says, “Above all else, my God is FAITHFUL!”. I know that through out whatever lies ahead -medication, counselling- God is with me. He holds me with His right hand and helps me. He loves me unconditionally and will see me through each and every step on this journey. He will make me strong again. He will cause me to mount up with wings as an eagle. I will not grow weary in well-doing. I will not faint along the way.
Two weeks ago before I’d been to the doctor and while I was feeling overwhelmed and incapable I thought of Jesus words in Matthew 11:28-30 (okay, I had to hunt it down, but I did remember reading it in Matthew) “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
And That’s What’s Happening on the Hobby Farm
P.S. Kristen took Present away from me; she said the pig is a bad influence on me.