Psalm 27:4 "One thing have I desired; that will I seek after. That I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life."

Posts tagged ‘animals’

I CAN Do It All!

As I was scurrying through life yesterday doing laundry, making bread, cutting a pile of old t-shirts into rags (they had cluttered my bedroom and then my laundry room long enough!), and thinking about the school I needed to do with Kurt and things I needed to check for Kristen, and the 1st quarter grades I needed to get together, I realized that I had bought a lie.

The lie that “you can have it all” really is a lie.  And honestly, if we had it all, would we even want it all?  You can’t have it.  Choices have to be made.  Paths diverge in life and you have to take one or the other.  Getting lost in the wilderness between paths only leads to confusion and guilt.  You’re not really sure which path you belong on (or which one is more important) and running between the two leads to neither path being as fulfilling as it could and should have been.  I made my choice of which path to follow and I’ve never regretted it.  I’m doing what I wanted to do.

The opposite of “you can have it all” is the lie that “you can’t DO it all.”  Hmmm.  I’ve listened to that one.  That one has led me down the slow path to depression.  I felt so overwhelmed by everything I couldn’t do.  “You can’t homeschool your kids AND keep your house clean AND cook for your family, too.”  “Something has to give.”  “You have to take time for yourself and just let things go.”  “You can’t garden and raise animals and can and bake . . . . .”  And the list of “you can’ts” goes on and on.

And as the lie built inside of me, it started coming out of my mouth!

“I’m too tired.  I’ll do it later, tomorrow, never.”

“I just don’t have the energy.”

“I’m so tired of this.  I just want to be their Mom.”

“I can do school or I can be Mom . . . I can’t do both.”

Wait a minute!  Who says I can’t?  I’ve been so caught up believing the lie that “I can’t” that I quit even TRYING to do SOMETHING!  I gave in to lazy and undisciplined under the guise of “I can’t do everything.”

But I chose this life.  I desired this life.  I asked for this life.  Granted, I jumped into parenthood, homeschooling and hobby farming completely unprepared for reality, but it’s still what I want to do.  By buying the lie, I totally ignored the Source  of my strength.

“I can do all things through Christ who give me strength.” (Phil. 4:13)

“He who began a good work in you will complete it until the Day of Jesus Christ.” (Phil. 1:6)

“My God shall supply all your needs according to His riches in glory through Christ Jesus.” (Phil. 4:19)

HE called me to be a Mom.

HE called me to teach my children at home.

HE placed in my selfish heart the desire for the farm and the animals and a garden and orchard.

HE gave me the desire to feed my family well.

And if HE brought me to it, HE will see me through it.  HE will sustain me in my infirmity (tiredness, weakness and lack of energy).

My Source, my Strength, my Energy, my Life.  And He’s not a cosmic force watching from afar.  HE LOVES ME!  He’s right here beside me folding clothes, washing dishes, baking bread, readings books, sweeping floors and cleaning stalls!  I’m free in Him to be me and I can DO IT ALL because HE says I can.  “Whatsoever you do shall prosper.”  (Ps. 1:3b)  I have HIS word on it!

And yesterday I got the school done, the laundry started, the food cooked, the floor swept, the bread made and still had time to paint the chalkboards on the pantry door (DIMS Day!) and the energy for church in the evening!

It’s all in my perspective:  believing the lie or believing the truth.

And That’s What’s Reflecting on the Pond.

 

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Why I’m Satisfied with Older Things

I told Joel the other morning that the older I get the more I’m satisfied with less. Give me my animals and I’m happy. I really don’t care that my van is 13 years old and has over 260,000 miles on it. I really don’t mind. My house is as old as the van and probably has as many miles on it and could use some sprucing up, but I’m okay with it. I’d have a fit if the carpet were new and the dogs ran across it with muddy feet (or Lexi “used” it) or Hubby wore dirty shoes across it or put a greasy machine part on it. It’s better to have older stained & torn carpet then a heart attack every time someone lives in the house.

Now, I did just go on a clothes spree at the re-sale shop, but I haven’t paid much attention to my wardrobe in years (part of that slow downward spiral that took a long time to hit bottom and take it’s toll).  My fashionista, Karra, looked at my clothes and said,

“Mom, you have some cute clothes you just need more color.”

Aw, that’s so sweet.  So, we all went and tried on clothes and I found some tank tops (more neutral than colorful) and a pretty ferns & flowers blouse, and a summery sweater in shocking pink! and a gorgeous knit shirt (that makes me look like Dolly Parton) in a bright torquoise.  Sometimes you need to wear something different than the norm.  I even bought a skirt & followed it up with a pair of pantyhose!  Gosh, I haven’t worn a dress to church in an eternity – or since I outgrew my really nice dressy clothes and never replaced them.

I guess I’m not satisfied with my 10 year old wardrobe anymore, but honestly I’m not interested in having a showplace house that’s perfectly decorated and right out of a magazine – that’s just too much work.  I like to tell people “This is a working house.  If you want to see a showplace, I have a friend that lives down the road.”  And her house is gorgeous.  It’s well kept, neat and tidy despite the dog.  It’s just not us.  Hello, we live on a hobby farm!  Even before the animals we had 5 acres of clay that turns to mud when it rains, or snows, or dews, or just gets looked at.  And I wouldn’t trade my animals for anything (though a house on the beach is VERY tempting, but comes with its own set of messes, i.e., sand, dry sand, wet sand, sand, and more sand).

So, I’m content.  Not that I want the whole world to see my shabby happy palace.  Now, the carpet is mostly the fault of the installers who put a seam right down the center of the room – for real???  Of course, I did pick a white berber because it wasn’t brown and the only other choice was blue.  We thought we’d replace our floorings in 5 or so years (before I filled the living room with stuffed to the gills bookshelves and the huge entertainment armoire that I will love FOREVER – it’s an Ethan Allen and I got if for a song at Big Lots!!!), but let’s see 5 years after we moved in we had given birth to my bouncy baby boy, had gone to Florida on vacation, I had discovered homesteading and was thinking about chickens and cows and sheep or goats, oh my!  Actually, we went to Hawaii and then got chickens but that was in ’07.  And of course we’ve mostly built a barn and had and  lost animals and now have two fun and lovable dogs.  So, the carpet stays, the paint is nicked and dirty, the wall around the new window in my closet still needs to be drywall finished and repainted and the bonus room (someone’s college apartment) is still unfinished.   Buy hey, once the kids start rotating out we’ll be able to fix up the girls bedrooms (which need it much more than Kurt’s).

I guess in the long run, my kids are healthy, intelligent, gifted and blessed.  They’ve given their hearts to Jesus.  What else really matters?

And That’s What’s Reflecting on the Pond Today.

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